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Old 2008-09-05, 02:25 PM   #1
NaughtyTeddy
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Sales text: what makes it good?

Hello,
what makes a text to stand out and to tickle surfer's mind?

What should be the mood of the text? Seducing, informing, admiring, etc?
What role should narrator take? Fellow buddy, porn guru or model?
What words and phrases call to the action the most?
Any other tips?

I'm referring to freesites here.

Thanks for your answers!

Last edited by NaughtyTeddy; 2008-09-05 at 02:33 PM..
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Old 2008-09-05, 09:25 PM   #2
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I'd say that whatever you write should be in your own voice or else it won't be authentic.

Think about what turns you on and what grabs your attention. Try different styles on similar ads/pages, and then use click tracking software to see what works.

Hope that helps.
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Old 2008-09-06, 03:22 AM   #3
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Theres really no magic words thats going to make surfers click links so I find it best just to write honest,accurate text that describes what it is I'm promoting.Sure I try to pump it up a bit but not to the point where it sounds like complete bullshit.After you get some sites out there,check your stats to see what text links had the biggest click rate and go from there.
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Old 2008-09-07, 12:17 PM   #4
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Could you guys share a few examples of freesites those promo text did great?
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Old 2008-09-07, 12:39 PM   #5
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sometimes I get crazy and describe some scene that goes with the content and other times I just write, "join now...millions of pictures, 2000+ videos, blah blah blah..." and I get simliar results on both tactics...I'm interested to see if anyone posts some of their more productive FS. That would be neat to see.
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Old 2008-09-10, 01:50 PM   #6
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well use your imagination..ask yourself what you would like to see. usually, i just use "Get Your Pass Here To Watch Her Screaming Orgasms" etc...
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Old 2008-09-10, 07:14 PM   #7
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Its a hit or miss thing. If the surfer reads what he/she likes theyll buy. Work on being descriptive with what you write. Every subject has its own tone and setting.
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Old 2008-09-10, 08:34 PM   #8
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Don't just write your sales text about the photos or videos, or about the category or kind of paysite for which you're trying to generate signups. Take time to read and study the specific tour pages that you're trying to get the surfer to visit.

Make notes of things like what voice the writer used. Notice if the text is talking directly to the reader, with a lot of the word 'you' in there. Or is it talking about the site from a third-party perspective, almost like an independent reviewer? Or is it written as if the writer is part of the site? Does the writer use a lot of slang, besides the standard porn terms. Does the text have lots of contractions (it should) or does it seem a bit stilted because it doesn't use them where it should? Notice if the writer perhaps didn't have English as their first language too.

Try writing your sales text in the same voice as the tour pages, including things like using the slang, contractions or lack of them, and any unusual word choices made by the writer on the tour pages.

You also want to pay particular attention to things like which of the popular synonyms the tour uses to describe things like penises, labia and vaginas, breasts, buttocks, women or men in general, and the specific sex acts on which the tour may be focused.

If the pages use 'cock' then try using that instead of dick or prick. If the tour pages call it a 'cunt' then don't call it a pussy. If the tour uses 'studs' and 'sluts' then use those terms instead of hunks and whores. Huge boobs on the tour? Then don't refer to them as big tits. Phat booties and bubble butts on the tour? Fat asses and round behinds may seem like reasonable alternatives but try using what the tour uses instead.

If she's getting 'face-fucked' then use that instead of saying she's deep-throating. Does the tour have strict Femdommes humiliating lowly male worms? Then calling her a latex babe and saying she's taking out her bad mood on her boyfriend won't resonate worth a damn when the surfer hits the tour page. If the surfer will be reading about women forced to orgasm over and over again until they can't take any more, make sure you're not talking about how she just can't get enough.

Well, I hope you get the idea. Try making your sales text flow seamlessly into the tour text and see if that improves things for you.

HTH


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Old 2008-09-10, 08:44 PM   #9
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wow Simon, that's quite a post! I never thought of things that way. I'm going to save it for inspiration, thanks for sharing

Last edited by ponygirl; 2008-09-10 at 08:46 PM.. Reason: too much |potleaf| lol
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Old 2008-09-10, 08:54 PM   #10
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One other thing that is important, and often overlooked, because it's somewhat psychological and perhaps seems too obvious, but it works.

End your short sales text statements with words or phrases that give a sense of urgency, such as Take the FREE Tour Today! or Instant Access! Join NOW!
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Old 2008-09-10, 10:54 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Simon View Post
Try writing your sales text in the same voice as the tour pages, including things like using the slang, contractions or lack of them, and any unusual word choices made by the writer on the tour pages.

You also want to pay particular attention to things like which of the popular synonyms the tour uses to describe things like penises, labia and vaginas, breasts, buttocks, women or men in general, and the specific sex acts on which the tour may be focused.
Very interesting, I'm going to give this a try...

I've always filtered traffic by niche and micro-niches, but never thought of going so far as to filter even further by matching ad text to the verbage on the paysite tour. Very interesting indeed.
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Old 2008-09-10, 11:49 PM   #12
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As a slight highjacking of this thread as it relates to what Simon and elKabong (woohoo!) said, the matching ad text to the paysite tour also goes for your banners/buttons. However for banners and buttons you want to attempt to match the type of model on the banner to the content of your gallery/blog first, and attempt a match on the tour later.

The latter one is usually easy since the same model that's on the tour appears in the banners most of the time. The reason you want to match banners to your content (i.e. if you got a lesbian freesite with a blonde and a redhead, you want banners with a blonde and a redhead too) it tends to raise CTR -- not by much, but it's a difference of 50 clicks v.s. 75 clicks to your sponsors.

Just my 2 cents based on some experiments I did a while ago, YMMV, #include <std_disclaimer.h>, if it breaks, you get to keep both pieces, it may eat your cat or dog, your wife might leave you, and your car might break. Use at your own risk, batteries not included, warranty not implied.

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Old 2008-09-11, 05:00 PM   #13
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I loved Simon's post, thats something I always wanted to know. Thanks for sharing!
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Old 2008-09-11, 07:00 PM   #14
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Simon and Toby bring up very good points.

- using the same "wording" style as the tour, Id say that helps as much as using similar colors and fonts of the tours..makes it feel seemless
- Use call to action words such as Join Now, Instant Access Take the Free Tour Now..is telling the surfer to do something..and that something would be to click over to the sponsors page.

Quick follow up to those techniques..do you think its better to link to a Direct Join page or to the tour?
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Old 2008-09-11, 07:10 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NY Jester View Post
Quick follow up to those techniques..do you think its better to link to a Direct Join page or to the tour?
Only if I've more or less built my own tour. That's pretty tough to do with just a one page gallery, so I usually send to the tour but not alway to the first tour page.
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Old 2008-09-11, 08:31 PM   #16
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Some good info - thanks

For my input - someone always told me to sell the sizzle and not the steak.
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Old 2008-09-12, 08:06 AM   #17
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If someone told you to sell the sizzle and not the steak, it may have been because their steak wasn't all that good. The wiser rule to follow may be "It's the sizzle that sells the steak." What I mean is there has to be a good steak there or you're wasting your time creating sizzle. And if there is a good steak there you can sell it a lot of ways besides just its sizzle. (worth a read) (also worth reading)

Toby and NY Jester mentioned something important that may get missed so I want to point out that using text that calls out for action is a good thing. And you can add to the impact by setting things up with questions first. For example, asking the reader if they like, or want to see something, followed by a call to action telling them to do something in order to get what they just answered 'yes' to in their mind.

Be careful though, about using the "Join Now!" type of approach if you haven't built your own tour (as Toby mentioned) or some powerful selling pages before having the surfer click that one. Why do I say that? Because I'm a strong believer that the 'join' word is best used to link to a Join page. I'd caution against sending a surfer to the main paysite entrance (or worse, the warning page) from a link which says Join Now but requires or even gives them the option to scroll and click through several more pages before getting to the actual Join page.*

But there are plenty of other good call-to-action phrases you can use if you're not sending them to the Join page. Take a look at what the surfer will see first when they click your link to go to the paysite tour. See what that page says to the surfer. See if it answers any questions. If it does, what do you think you can do? Yep, you guessed correctly, you can now ask the surfers a question on your freesite and promise them the answer is just a click away on that paysite tour page.

Boiling it down, my suggestion is to tailor your link text to target as closely as possible what will happen on the surfer's screen, and in his or her mind, when they click that link and are shown the next page.


--
(For those who know about cognitive dissonance, the idea is just to avoid creating any whenever you can, particularly regarding the concept of Joining a site.)
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Last edited by Simon; 2008-09-12 at 08:10 AM..
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Old 2008-09-14, 10:09 PM   #18
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Thanks Simon - I think I was trying to say the same as you... but only used 5 words instead of 5 paragraphs and it wasn't well explained

Thanks for the links - reading now
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Old 2008-09-15, 02:57 AM   #19
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This is a great thread! I reckon that effectively preselling the surfer by matching the style and tone of the target paysite is one of the best things you can do to make more money - but is also one of the most difficult parts of webmastering.

This is something I refer to quite often when writing copy. I saved it off a message board ages ago, so I can't credit the original author.

Quote:
Questions about the product:

1. What are the benefits associated with the product?
2. How does the product relate to the customer's two strongest motivations: desire for gain and fear of loss?
3. How is it different from competing products?
4. How can I receive the preceived value of the product?
5. How can I improve the customer's perception of the product?

Questions about the customer:

1. Who is the primary customer, and what percentage of the market do they represent?
2. What does the customer expect to gain from purchasing the product?
3. What potential loss might the customer expect from not purchasing the product?
4. What objections and excuses might the customer use to delay or avoid the purchasing decision?
5. What rebuttals to this can you provide?
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Old 2008-09-15, 06:37 AM   #20
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Ok, now I've got enough info for thinking and experimenting. Psychological marketing is a turn-on for me.

Here are the main points of this thread that I want to embed by putting them down:
  • Freesite -> Flow -> Paysite
  • Call to action
  • Raise a question or desire -> Show a way to achieve it -> Provide it
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