Pet Peeve Time

Useless · 2008-09-17, 12:06 PM

I'm having a bit of a temper tantrum this morning, so that makes it a good time to get some shit off my chest that truly annoys about some submitters. I realize that not all reviewers will agree with me on the following points, but they don't work for me. This time would be better spent reviewing my ever-expanding backlog, but no, I need to be here lecturing on Free Site Submission 101.

Descriptions - I'm not looking for a great work of fiction nor do I care about the back story. All I want is this: DESCRIBE THE CONTENT. Yes, I take the word description rather literally. Now, I realize that you do need to go beyond "girl getting fucked" with reality sites, but don't go overboard with creative freedom. All you need is one simple line telling the surfer or the reviewer what is to be expected on your galleries. Also, never write a description in the first person even if you are the guy jacking off on the dead goat in the pics.

Unnecessary Line Breaks - Some of you either SUCK at copying and pasting your info on to the submission form or it's time for you to figure out how to use your submission software. I swear, I'm eventually going to have my script coded so that it scans for line breaks within the submitted data, dumps your submission, and emails you a large photo of Goatse for seven consecutive days.

Photo Quality - It isn't 2006 and it certainly the hell isn't 1996. Get with the times and optimize your thumbs and full sized photos so that they are clear. I NEED to list quality sites and galleries. Trust me, you aren't going to see a huge leap in bandwidth usage if you wake up and improve the quality of your photos to a point that I no longer feel like I'm looking at vintage porn that has been colorized. There is no excuse for grainy photos in a post 9-11 world. None.

Site Design - Why would you employ a hover effect on your links that makes your whole fucking page jiggle? Changing text color during hover is fine, but changing font-size, font-style or font-weight is ugly and goddamn annoying. CUT THAT SHIT OUT!

I'm seriously considering tossing out all of my rules on the mighty Perv and simply accepting what I like based on content originality, content quality, overall site design, and (YES!) recip grouping.

WildChyld · 2008-09-17, 12:43 PM

Do you feel better now?

Useless · 2008-09-17, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildChyld

Do you feel better now?

Do yourself a favor: spend your time shilling for AFF instead irritating me.

Licker4U · 2008-09-17, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

ISite Design - Why would you employ a hover effect on your links that makes your whole fucking page jiggle? Changing text color during hover is fine, but changing font-size, font-style or font-weight is ugly and goddamn annoying. CUT THAT SHIT OUT!

I think I'm guilty of that and will try and catch it in the future..

Greenguy · 2008-09-17, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

...Photo Quality - It isn't 2006 and it certainly the hell isn't 1996. Get with the times and optimize your thumbs and full sized photos so that they are clear. I NEED to list quality sites and galleries. Trust me, you aren't going to see a huge leap in bandwidth usage if you wake up and improve the quality of your photos to a point that I no longer feel like I'm looking at vintage porn that has been colorized. There is no excuse for grainy photos in a post 9-11 world. None.

Site Design - Why would you employ a hover effect on your links that makes your whole fucking page jiggle? Changing text color during hover is fine, but changing font-size, font-style or font-weight is ugly and goddamn annoying. CUT THAT SHIT OUT!..

I have no comment on the 1st 2 since I don't pay any much attention to the blabber submitters put in the description area, but I'm with you on these 2, especially the 2nd one.

I can't tell you how many times I've been "scared" by text or thumbs that increase when you mose over them & adjust the entire page.

LD · 2008-09-17, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Licker4U

I think I'm guilty of that and will try and catch it in the future..

Me too...I though I was being "creative"...

Cleo · 2008-09-17, 03:44 PM

My biggest pet peeve is submitters who submit the same fucking niche every fucking day.

Licker4U · 2008-09-17, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cleo

My biggest pet peeve is submitters who submit the same fucking niche every fucking day.

Well shit, that's me too. I'll to diversify

WildChyld · 2008-09-17, 05:57 PM

If you're that easily irritated me asking you if you feel better is far from the worst of your problems

Useless · 2008-09-17, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildChyld

If you're that easily irritated me asking you if you feel better is far from the worst of your problems

Go fuck yourself, mkay? This thread isn't for the useless commentary of has-beens, idiots, or anyone else who has nothing to do with the wonderful world of free sites. I'm even less interested in your commentary than I am in that thieving, lying company you work for. Got it? GO SCREW!

Useless · 2008-09-17, 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greenie

I have no comment on the 1st 2 since I don't pay any much attention to the blabber submitters put in the description area...

Some submitters are spot-on when it comes to simple, yet decorative, description writing. It's almost as if they take this business seriously and have viewed a link list or two.

On my older, now smaller, link list, I try to use the submitted description since it's not worth my very valuable time to spend too much time fussing around over there. On Perv, where I write 99% of the descriptions, I still like a sensible description to be submitted because I use it to get an idea of what angle the submitter is attempting to market and it gives me something to work from when writing my lengthier marketing prose. (All I ask for is the standard description they use to submit everywhere else.) I'm constantly tweaking things there in an attempt to get everyone's sites seen while getting ad views for myself. I even try to squeeze in a little extra love for my prize submitters when I can, usually in the form of keyworded one-way links to their hubs or blogs or whatever within the descriptions.

JustRobert · 2008-09-17, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

I even try to squeeze in a little extra love for my prize submitters when I can, usually in the form of keyworded one-way links to their hubs or blogs or whatever within the descriptions.

thank you, oh Great One

Preacher · 2008-09-17, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

There is no excuse for grainy photos in a post 9-11 world. None.

Amen, and 600x400 picture sites?! Come'on I've got vidcaps that are bigger than that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

Site Design - Why would you employ a hover effect on your links that makes your whole fucking page jiggle? Changing text color during hover is fine, but changing font-size, font-style or font-weight is ugly and goddamn annoying. CUT THAT SHIT OUT!

Useless · 2008-09-17, 07:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustRobert

thank you, oh Great One

You just put a huge smile on my face.

Tell your beautiful wife that the ugly little guy with the shaved head says 'hi'. No, not Preacher - ME!

virgohippy · 2008-09-17, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

I even try to squeeze in a little extra love for my prize submitters when I can, usually in the form of keyworded one-way links to their hubs or blogs or whatever within the descriptions.

I noticed.

WildChyld · 2008-09-17, 09:47 PM

classy as always

JustRobert · 2008-09-17, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

Tell your beautiful wife

You have now put a huge smile on her face. She says Thank You and sends you a

Useless · 2008-09-17, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildChyld

classy as always

Is there a reason that you can't just shut the fuck up? You came to this board to be a pain in the ass for AFF. You started a crappy SPAM thread for AFF, which resulted in hurt feelings amongst friends of mine and this board. I dislike you. You have no business in this thread and I am honestly beginning to think that you have a problem with me, and that's the reason you are posting in this thread. Did someone put you up to this? Do I know you from a past life?

elKabong · 2008-09-17, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

I'm seriously considering tossing out all of my rules on the mighty Perv and simply accepting what I like based on content originality, content quality, overall site design, and (YES!) recip grouping.

I've got a question... (hand raised while ducking to avoid getting smacked on the fingers

)

How would a submitter know the recip grouping that a site owner prefers? Just browse a bunch of listed sites and try to figure it out?

WildChyld · 2008-09-17, 11:06 PM

This isn't the first time you've picked fights with me over the years and I've never done a damn thing to you.

I can tell you this, I'm done acknowledging your existence.
Your negativity wasn't worth my time before and it sure as hell isn't now either.

Useless · 2008-09-17, 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildChyld

This isn't the first time you've picked fights with me over the years and I've never done a damn thing to you.

I have NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE! Refresh my memory: when have I EVER picked a fight with you? And more importantly, I didn't pick a fight with you in this thread. You are the one who engaged me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildChyld

I can tell you this, I'm done acknowledging your existence.
Your negativity wasn't worth my time before and it sure as hell isn't now either.

Before? When? You posted in this thread to screw with me and I'm the negative one? Fuck you, Lorsha.

Mateusz · 2008-09-18, 05:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

I'm having a bit of a temper tantrum this morning, so that makes it a good time to get some shit off my chest that truly annoys about some submitters....

I agree on everything

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cleo

My biggest pet peeve is submitters who submit the same fucking niche every fucking day.

So is mine
After I list 3 in a row, I list every third or fifth site they submit

Greenguy · 2008-09-18, 09:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

Some submitters are spot-on when it comes to simple, yet decorative, description writing. It's almost as if they take this business seriously and have viewed a link list or two. |loony\

Now that you mention it, I do occasionally see descriptions that look as if I wrote them, which means they do visit the site & poke around & my writing style has influenced their descriptions.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Useless Warrior

...Fuck you, Lorsha.

Brilliant

Fonz · 2008-09-18, 10:34 AM

I agree with ya UW and Cleo, maybe it's time to start sending warnings to people who keep annoying me. But I've got to clear my review queue first before I start doing other things

papagmp · 2008-09-18, 02:29 PM

I copy and paste from an Excel file. As per our conversation a while back, this may be one of the reasons for the extra line breaks. When you brought this up the first time, I was copying from the spreadsheet cell. I switched to copying from the cells to copying from the data entry field at the top of the spreadsheet. I ask you if this had fixed the problem but I don't recall ever getting a response. Also - at the time, you said it was only an issue on whoringwives - I don't recall if it was an issue with pervespace.

If you are still having a problem with extra line breaks on my submits, please let me know and we'll find a way to get rid of them.

As for submitting to different cats - I try to spread my submissions across the cats as much as the content will allow. With LL's that have fewer cats, or that require cat specific recips this is a little more difficult. Typically, I try to throw a lesbian, teen, outdoor, hardcore, sex-toy, petite etc between the reality and amateur submits. If a LL only has cats for hardcore, teen and amateur, that LL will get more sites submitted to these cats. If you have cats such as brunette, shaved, itty-bitty-titties (did I mention I like itty-bitty-titties) etc, I'm more likely to send a site to these cats (when appropriate) to spread the submits out. Bottom line is I'm probably going to continue submitting FS's that feature my own program - don't expect me to be making any gay sites in the near future.

I agree with you 100% on the font changes when hovering - it's just plain irritating - just about as irritating as a page that auto-plays sounds - even if there is a delay as the video loads

As for photo and thumb quality, for me, this goes for the video thumbs as well. Spend 2 minutes in Photoshop and make them at least light enough to see WTF is happening in the scene.

And for Christ sake, leave my goat out of this - he's not dead, he just plays dead because he knows I like it that way.

But as usual, we all know the best way to keep Useless happy

2008-09-17, 12:06 PM	#1
Useless Certified Nice Person Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Dirty Undies, NY Posts: 11,268	Pet Peeve Time I'm having a bit of a temper tantrum this morning, so that makes it a good time to get some shit off my chest that truly annoys about some submitters. I realize that not all reviewers will agree with me on the following points, but they don't work for me. This time would be better spent reviewing my ever-expanding backlog, but no, I need to be here lecturing on Free Site Submission 101. Descriptions - I'm not looking for a great work of fiction nor do I care about the back story. All I want is this: DESCRIBE THE CONTENT. Yes, I take the word description rather literally. Now, I realize that you do need to go beyond "girl getting fucked" with reality sites, but don't go overboard with creative freedom. All you need is one simple line telling the surfer or the reviewer what is to be expected on your galleries. Also, never write a description in the first person even if you are the guy jacking off on the dead goat in the pics. Unnecessary Line Breaks - Some of you either SUCK at copying and pasting your info on to the submission form or it's time for you to figure out how to use your submission software. I swear, I'm eventually going to have my script coded so that it scans for line breaks within the submitted data, dumps your submission, and emails you a large photo of Goatse for seven consecutive days. Photo Quality - It isn't 2006 and it certainly the hell isn't 1996. Get with the times and optimize your thumbs and full sized photos so that they are clear. I NEED to list quality sites and galleries. Trust me, you aren't going to see a huge leap in bandwidth usage if you wake up and improve the quality of your photos to a point that I no longer feel like I'm looking at vintage porn that has been colorized. There is no excuse for grainy photos in a post 9-11 world. None. Site Design - Why would you employ a hover effect on your links that makes your whole fucking page jiggle? Changing text color during hover is fine, but changing font-size, font-style or font-weight is ugly and goddamn annoying. CUT THAT SHIT OUT! I'm seriously considering tossing out all of my rules on the mighty Perv and simply accepting what I like based on content originality, content quality, overall site design, and (YES!) recip grouping. __________________ Click here to purchase a bridge I'm selling.

2008-09-17, 03:44 PM	#7
Cleo Subversive filth of the hedonistic decadent West Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Southeast Florida Posts: 27,936	My biggest pet peeve is submitters who submit the same fucking niche every fucking day. __________________ Free Rides on Uber and Lyft Uber Car: uberTzTerri Lyft Car: TZ896289

2008-09-18, 10:34 AM	#24
Fonz Former pr0n slinger. Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Antwerp, Belgium Posts: 7,929	I agree with ya UW and Cleo, maybe it's time to start sending warnings to people who keep annoying me. But I've got to clear my review queue first before I start doing other things __________________ See how I abuse little trees on my Shumi no Bonsai Blog

2008-09-18, 02:29 PM	#25
papagmp That'll teach you to leave your sister unattended..... Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Colorado Springs Posts: 1,803	I copy and paste from an Excel file. As per our conversation a while back, this may be one of the reasons for the extra line breaks. When you brought this up the first time, I was copying from the spreadsheet cell. I switched to copying from the cells to copying from the data entry field at the top of the spreadsheet. I ask you if this had fixed the problem but I don't recall ever getting a response. Also - at the time, you said it was only an issue on whoringwives - I don't recall if it was an issue with pervespace. If you are still having a problem with extra line breaks on my submits, please let me know and we'll find a way to get rid of them. As for submitting to different cats - I try to spread my submissions across the cats as much as the content will allow. With LL's that have fewer cats, or that require cat specific recips this is a little more difficult. Typically, I try to throw a lesbian, teen, outdoor, hardcore, sex-toy, petite etc between the reality and amateur submits. If a LL only has cats for hardcore, teen and amateur, that LL will get more sites submitted to these cats. If you have cats such as brunette, shaved, itty-bitty-titties (did I mention I like itty-bitty-titties) etc, I'm more likely to send a site to these cats (when appropriate) to spread the submits out. Bottom line is I'm probably going to continue submitting FS's that feature my own program - don't expect me to be making any gay sites in the near future. I agree with you 100% on the font changes when hovering - it's just plain irritating - just about as irritating as a page that auto-plays sounds - even if there is a delay as the video loads As for photo and thumb quality, for me, this goes for the video thumbs as well. Spend 2 minutes in Photoshop and make them at least light enough to see WTF is happening in the scene. And for Christ sake, leave my goat out of this - he's not dead, he just plays dead because he knows I like it that way. But as usual, we all know the best way to keep Useless happy __________________ Submit: OutlawFreePorn

2008-09-17, 12:43 PM	#2
WildChyld WHO IS FONZY!?! Don't they teach you anything at school? Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Berkeley California Posts: 49	Do you feel better now?

2008-09-17, 05:57 PM	#9
WildChyld WHO IS FONZY!?! Don't they teach you anything at school? Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Berkeley California Posts: 49	If you're that easily irritated me asking you if you feel better is far from the worst of your problems

2008-09-17, 09:47 PM	#16
WildChyld WHO IS FONZY!?! Don't they teach you anything at school? Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Berkeley California Posts: 49	classy as always

2008-09-17, 11:06 PM	#20
WildChyld WHO IS FONZY!?! Don't they teach you anything at school? Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Berkeley California Posts: 49	This isn't the first time you've picked fights with me over the years and I've never done a damn thing to you. I can tell you this, I'm done acknowledging your existence. Your negativity wasn't worth my time before and it sure as hell isn't now either.