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Old 2007-09-22, 08:08 AM   #1
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At last a REAL football match between us.

As I type this, America is about to play England at football (soccer). It is about your only chance to beat us as it is your women's team. I'd wish you good luck, but you know I don't mean it. I'll also not say "may the best team win", because the bookies say that is you, so I don't mean that either (your male soccer teams may be shit, but your woman's team is number one in the world).

But despite this advantage. WE ARE GOING TO TAKE YOU DOWN!!!!!!!

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Old 2007-09-22, 08:11 AM   #2
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The problem is that no one in America cares
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Old 2007-09-22, 08:48 AM   #3
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The problem is that no one in America cares
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Old 2007-09-22, 08:53 AM   #4
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Off to a REAL (spanish for ROYAL) football game now. May the best team win
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Old 2007-09-22, 09:00 AM   #5
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The problem is that no one in America cares
How unpatriotic of you lot! It does show at the match. At the start of the match, when the British National Anthem played, a hell of a of lot of people cheered. When the American national anthem played, very few people cheered.

Me, I got George Crosses (the England flag) all over my flat, and in the window.

Is your lack of interest because your country is usually crap at this sport, or because they are women players? (Or because it is the one sport where American women are a hell of a lot better than American men, and your masculinity feels threatened? )
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Old 2007-09-22, 09:24 AM   #6
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Is your lack of interest because your country is usually crap at this sport, or because they are women players? (Or because it is the one sport where American women are a hell of a lot better than American men, and your masculinity feels threatened? )

No no, it isn't like that at all. We just prefer real sports. Even full contact bong rips is more exciting than soccer
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Old 2007-09-22, 10:01 AM   #7
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USA 3 - England 0
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Old 2007-09-22, 10:35 AM   #8
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No no, it isn't like that at all. We just prefer real sports. Even full contact bong rips is more exciting than soccer
Define real sports?

If you mean American football, you know that was invented when American players cheated at rugby and got thrown out? Rather than play fairly they set up their own league. (And rugby was created when a soccer team cheated at soccer).

If you mean basketball - real sport?????

And if you mean baseball, that is based on a version of cricket that was created for children because cricket was too hard for really young kids.

Also: As a patriotic American, you should be following women's soccer, because although your solo athletes are good, women's football is the only team game you excel at internationally. In every other team sport (not including solo sports played in teams, like golf) the world whips your ass. And that includes American football!!!

And they are about the toughest players you have too. Soccer is not a contact sport, but accidents and deliberate fouls happen. After which the women get up and play on. There was a incident in the match I just watched which although involved an English player, American players do the same when the situation is reversed. One player got badly hit in the face, then fallen on. It left her in a lot of pain, but no physical injury. So she only stepped off the field long enough for the medic to stop the blood flowing, then got back on with the game. Male football players (both soccer and American football) not only leave the game, but usually take weeks off, just because "they stubbed their toe a little bit".

Last edited by ecchi; 2007-09-22 at 10:46 AM..
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Old 2007-09-22, 10:42 AM   #9
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USA 3 - England 0
Yeah, you bastards.

There is a popular conspiracy theory: If global warming is ever proved true, Europe intends to reduce pollution by stopping the major polluters. And since the major polluters are America and China, the 'final solution', to prevent global warming, if it ever becomes critical, is to nuke China and America. Well After America beat us on Chinese soil 3-0, I'm off to try and convince the European leaders that we have reached that critical stage.

Then I am going to talk to our government. If our women cannot beat your lot at football, I think it is time we reconsidered allowing them the vote.
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Old 2007-09-22, 10:59 AM   #10
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shut up and hike the fucking ball!
then pack the bong, that's the only sport you didn't dissect with factoids that don't mean 3 shits in a shoebox to anyone.

However, the definition of "real sports" is entirely open to interpretation by the individual. Whereas you interpret your variation of the game one way, that's wonderful, swell, nifty and all that jazz, however, remember one thing...

In 1814 we took a little trip
Along with Colonel Jackson down the mighty Mississip.
We took a little bacon and we took a little beans
And we caught the bloody British in the town of New Orleans.

We fired our guns and the British kept a'comin.
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago.
We fired once more and they began to runnin' on
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico.

so put that in my pipe and I'll smoke it.
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:18 AM   #11
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However, the definition of "real sports" is entirely open to interpretation by the individual. Whereas you interpret your variation of the game one way, that's wonderful, swell, nifty and all that jazz, however, remember one thing...
My post was not meant as an attack on US, but on Greenie & your comments on women's soccer, sorry you can't take someone having a differing opinion to you.

However: My comment on basketball was personal interpretation, but the rest is historical fact (look it up in a sport's almanac if you don't believe me). You cannot change facts just because you don't like them (despite what they might think in Washington and Westminster).

As to your little rhyme if the most recent thing you can think of where an American 'team' beat a British 'team' is in 1814 then I feel kind of proud to be British, we may not be much good at most sports, but we've won lots of things since 1814.

Last edited by ecchi; 2007-09-22 at 11:20 AM..
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:22 AM   #12
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When I first saw the title of this thread I figured it would be about Sunday nights Cowboys - Bears game.
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:27 AM   #13
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Sorry, my US history is a little shaky (I got an 'O' level in it, but that was a long time ago), re-reading my last post I just had a thought.

Didn't you win the battle of independence in 1776? What were you doing still fighting us in 1814, surely it didn't take you 38 years to finally get rid of us? Even in my most patriotic mode I find it hard to imagine that we managed to keep up the fight that long.
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:30 AM   #14
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When I first saw the title of this thread I figured it would be about Sunday nights Cowboys - Bears game.
Didn't you see the word "REAL" before the word "football" in the title?
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:31 AM   #15
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I can take a differing opinion just fine buddy, the bottom fucking line is nobody give a cheesy rat's ass.

I'm glad you feel proud to be British, I'd have less respect for you if you weren't proud of your country. You are the one that keeps referrring to the us vs them thing. And since you are not passing the hooter, fuck it, I'll roll another of my own. So much for goodwill and all that jazz.

Further, do not EVER challenge my mother fucking patriotism, lest you intend to kiss my Red, White, and Blue Ass!

American by birth,
Southern by the grace of God,
Mississippian by choice!
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:36 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ecchi View Post
Sorry, my US history is a little shaky (I got an 'O' level in it, but that was a long time ago), re-reading my last post I just had a thought.

Didn't you win the battle of independence in 1776? What were you doing still fighting us in 1814, surely it didn't take you 38 years to finally get rid of us? Even in my most patriotic mode I find it hard to imagine that we managed to keep up the fight that long.
New Orleans wasn't part of the original 13 colonies. It was part of the Louisiana Purchase, acquired from France in 1803. The Battle of New Orleans was one of the last of the War of 1812

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Old 2007-09-22, 11:41 AM   #17
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do not EVER challenge my mother fucking patriotism
Patriotism is not what you feel, it is what you do. On the Internet your posts can be read by the entire world. If you give a bad impression of yourself as an "American" you are giving a bad impression of America. As far as 'patriotism' goes, you may as well be burning the flag and pissing on the Alamo.

Last edited by ecchi; 2007-09-22 at 11:44 AM..
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:42 AM   #18
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New Orleans wasn't part of the original 13 colonies. It was part of the Louisiana Purchase, acquired from France in 1803. The Battle of New Orleans was one of the last of the War of 1812
Thanks for the info.
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Old 2007-09-22, 11:52 AM   #19
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I'd much rather be just slapping the unholy piss out of your retarded ass.
Speaking of impressions, does the impression you give off as an arrogant prick justify the opinion you instill in said readers of your posts?

It's all good though, we can still be allies, so I'd like to cordially invite you to eat dye and shit blue.

you still haven't passed that joint, so not only are you an egotistical prick, you are also a greedy cocksucker.

but you do have yourself a bloody fine day now, ya hear?
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Old 2007-09-22, 12:03 PM   #20
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I'd much rather be just slapping the unholy piss out of your retarded ass.
Speaking of impressions, does the impression you give off as an arrogant prick justify the opinion you instill in said readers of your posts?

It's all good though, we can still be allies, so I'd like to cordially invite you to eat dye and shit blue.

you still haven't passed that joint, so not only are you an egotistical prick, you are also a greedy cocksucker.

but you do have yourself a bloody fine day now, ya hear?
*sigh*
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Old 2007-09-22, 12:10 PM   #21
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*sigh*
I concur. Get back to me when you finally get hair on your chest
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Old 2007-09-22, 12:27 PM   #22
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Oh you didn't say "real football" is soccer did you

To me soccer is the most boring sport there is but if you like it then fine enjoy it.

But to compare football and soccer makes me think of all kinds of things I'd like to call you right now but I'm a lady
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Old 2007-09-22, 12:46 PM   #23
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But to compare football and soccer makes me think of all kinds of things I'd like to call you right now but I'm a lady
By football I take it you mean American football (outside the USA, football means soccer). If you re-read my first reply to FanTC you will notice; (1) your is not really needed, he beat you to it, and (2) American football is actually a variation of Soccer.

Brief history: During a soccer match a player picked up the ball and ran with it, placing it in the goal (not allowed in soccer). The player asked the referee "Is that a goal?", to which he replied "No but it was a bloody good try." This started a new version of football. Since this happened at a British public school called Rugby, and to distinguish this game from football, it was called rugby football. I don't follow the game, but apparently back passing is not allowed in rugby football. When the game was played in America, American teams cheated by back passing. They kept doing this and eventually got thrown out of the league. Then they started their own league (with back passing allowed) and dropped the word Rugby, just calling it football. So basically what you Americans call football is basically the same game as the rest of the world calls football (and you call soccer) except that you allow cheating.

Oh yeah, and your teams dress up in loads of sissy protection, the rest of the world is tough enough not to bother.

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Old 2007-09-22, 12:52 PM   #24
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Sorry, posted in haste and missed your main point: By "real football" I meant woman's soccer. If I had only meant soccer I would have just said "football", because I am not American.
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Old 2007-09-22, 01:15 PM   #25
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Soccer is a girls game, like figure skating. Rugby and football are both sports, like hockey
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