Thanks a lot again guys. This thread and the "Moment of Silence" thread has meant so much to me. I do sneak in and look at them everyday. Also thank you to those that have sent cards with checks for the Humane Society and just donated straight to them.
I have to admit that I have been on a bender for the last 2 weeks. The problem with me and a bender is...I really don' care for the taste of alcohol.
But, I have gotten used to Johnny Walker Blue.
Every night I feel like I will be ready for real work the next day and then when I wake up, I see thinks of Vickie's and I just go back into a depression. I am trying to come back but it is so hard. Just having the simple routine of coming in my office in the morning and having Vickie yell up coffee is ready not happening anymore, rips me apart.
I am so lucky that my sister in law has decided to stay here for as long as I want her to. I really am bad at taking care of animals and as you all know, "we have dogs". For the past 3-1/2 months, she has been our angel. And, somehow I don't think I will ever be able to repay her for all she has done. Of course free room and board and some cash has to help.
The best part is that she is 100% Lesbian so her and I staying with each other doesn't make it weird to anyone in our family.
Our children are doing OK. A couple of them are taking it really hard and are making some bad decisions. But, I think I may have stopped that.
Anyway, I am still going to take some time to get back to normal. Construction has started on our bar room where Vickie's Bike will hang from the wall forever. I am beginning construction on my living room sometime today..I think.
I do feel lucky because there are so many people that never find the love of their life. I have and now she is gone
But, I had her for over 20 years. I will never be in a real relationship again because nobody will ever be able to compare to my wonderful wife. Not saying I won't go out on dates..just no real relationships.